Scars of the Past
by letirreis
Summary: AU - In which Emily is with the BAU, but JJ isn't. Heading home from work, Emily could never imagine the horror she would witness. When tragedy hits the life of Jennifer Jareau, will she be able to heal and be happy again? Jemily, as always.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Yeah, well, I know. I still gotta finish Never Forget and here I am, posting another fic. But I'd never be able to work on the final chapter of Never Forget if I didn't take this idea out of my head and put it into words. I don't know how this will be, though... I'll figure it out as it goes...**

 **I hope you like it! R &R**

 **Scars of the Past**

 **Prologue**

She had never felt so much pain in her life. Her nerves were all a mess, trying to understand exactly where the pain was coming from, but to no avail: everything hurt. And with that confuse response from her nervous system, her brain did the only thing he could do with the overflow of electric signals running through her body: it shut down. Because she couldn't stand the pain anymore.

* * *

When she woke up, there were a lot of people around her. But as soon as she opened her eyes, the pain was back, and increasing at an alarming rate. Suddenly, her whole body was on fire and she tried to scream, but no sound came out of her mouth. A lot of voices were shouting around her and she could only make out a few words.

"Someone call 911!"

"… her shirt…"

"Water!"

She was lying down on her stomach. Her hands were above her head, and when she looked at them, they were badly injured. She tried to turn, but she felt soft hands touch her face, and she looked up to see a pair of deep brown eyes staring comfortingly at her.

"Hey honey, don't be afraid. I'm here with you, okay? But you can't move, honey, or you may hurt yourself more…"

She didn't know what was happening. Was she injured? Why could she hurt herself more?

The woman, seeing her panic, caressed her cheek softly and held her less injured hand.

"Don't worry, honey. Help is on the way and I'll be here with you the whole time, okay?"

And she believed her. And she held her hand as tight as she could, because at that moment, this woman became her port in the storm.

But then, what she thought impossible happened: the pain got incredible worse. And it was like her skin was being ripped off. She welcomed the darkness once more.

* * *

When she opened her eyes again, the ceiling was moving above her and there were a lot of heads floating beside her. They were saying things, but she couldn't quite comprehend the words.

"Magnesium oxide…"

"Temp is rising…"

She then felt someone inserting something in her arm and that made her almost throw up in pain. What the hell was happening?

She started to panic. She just wanted to open her eyes and see that this was a terrible nightmare, even though she didn't know what 'it' was. If she could bet, she would say that this was the Apocalypse and the world was consuming itself on fire. Or that she was on a spaceship that was sent to the surface of the sun.

But, maybe, she could be in hell. She definitely wasn't a saint, and she had failed a lot of people throughout her life. Maybe this was her punishment.

"BP is dropping!"

"Her breathing is rapid!"

"She's in shock!"

She couldn't be dead. This was completely wrong… there were too many people, too many noises, too many stimulus that only real life could offer.

And for the first time in her life, she wished to be dead.

Because she couldn't stand this anymore.

"Who the hell put these cloths on her?"

She was shocked when a woman entered in her line of sight and talked to her. She was shocked because for the briefest of moments, she focused on something other than her melting skin. It was the same woman that held her hand on the street.

"Jennifer? You are in the hospital, honey. They're going to treat you and you will be better, okay? I know that it hurts, but stay strong for me, okay?"

And maybe, Jennifer realized, if it were under different circumstances, she might have appreciated those deep trusting brown eyes, so caring and yet confident; she might have noticed how she liked the husky voice that entered her mind and captured her attention; she might have noticed how her lips seemed to have been perfectly designed.

And if it were different circumstances, she might have wanted to stay awake a little longer.

But she knew that the only thing waiting for her was pain, and she wasn't strong enough to fight anymore.

Not even for the most beautiful woman she ever saw.

So she just closed her eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Thank you all for the amazing response to this! I didn't expect it and you made me one happy girl haha**

 **I have a few things to say:**

 **1\. Idk if you read my other fic, but I'll say it again: English is not my first language. I apologize for any mistakes ;)**

 **2\. Since I am not from the US, I don't know how your health system works. So I had to take some liberties here and I also wrote some things the way it is here in my country.**

 **3\. Finally, I am not a doctor, nor anything related to this area. I did my best to find the right answers, and if I made a mistake, I'm sorry about it and please, tell me if you see anything wrong.**

 **Thank you all! I hope you enjoy this.**

 **First – Emily's POV**

Everything happened so fast. From the moment I saw that woman lying on the ground, to the moment I walked into the hospital, still holding her hand, it must have passed almost an hour. But in my foggy mind, it was as if all had happened in just one blink of an eye.

I was exhausted. But I couldn't leave. I couldn't let this woman alone, in pain. I had searched her things, trying to see if there was anyone I could call, but I had found nothing. So I stayed.

I held her hand while she cried in pain. I held her hand while the doctors had to pull the cloths that were stuck to her skin. I held her hand while the doctors had to give her a drug that soothed the feeling that she was on fire.

I looked at the injured woman while she lay on the bed, attached to IV fluids. She was beautiful. Her blonde hair adorned the deepest blue eyes I had ever seen; eyes that were now dulled with pain and confusion.

I needed to get out of that room for a moment; I needed to breathe a little. Standing, I leaned closer to her and smiled.

"Hey, there. I'm going to drink something, but I'll be back as soon as possible, okay?"

But the battered woman just blinked. That was the only sign that she acknowledged me at all.

I had just left the room when a man in his late forties approached me.

"You must be the woman that came in with Jennifer"

"Yes, I am Emily Prentiss" I said, holding out my hand to greet him.

"I am Doctor Richard Green, chief of the ER. Were you able to get in touch with anyone that can be responsible for her?"

I just swallowed, saddened by this situation.

"No, I wasn't. But you can report to me, I'll be with her until we can contact someone…"

The doctor sighed.

"I will do this because Jennifer is in a very serious condition. She came in with severe chemical burnings to her back, neck and hands and though we did a primary treatment by removing her clothes, washing the area and administrating IV fluids, we don't have means or personnel to treat it here. She needs to be transported to a burn center immediately."

I just nodded, having already anticipated this.

"The nearest burn center we have is in Washington Hospital Center." I said, remembering one case I had worked with my team – the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI - that involved a pyromaniac.

The doctor agreed.

"That is correct. I've already contacted the doctors and they are waiting for her." He paused for a moment, and then continued. "Ms. Prentiss, I need to clarify this with you: she needs treatment immediately; we don't have time to look for her family. She will be transferred, whether you decide to continue with her or not. But I will say this: she will need support. But this is not your responsibility. If you decide to leave, a nurse will be appointed to be with her."

I took a deep breath. This was indeed not my responsibility. I could go home and no one could blame me.

I had been heading home after an exhausting day at work when I got stuck in traffic jam. I remember looking out the window when a man shouted on the street, calling for a woman. What happened next, I would never be able to understand. The man reached for a bottle in his pocket, opened it and threw a liquid at her direction. He intended to throw it on her face, but luckily she turned her back towards him, putting her hands between them, as if trying to stop the liquid from splashing all over her. When the woman fell to the ground, screaming in pain, I quickly got out of my car, pulling out my gun.

I shouted at him to stop, but he just took off running through the cars. I considered chasing him for a moment, but then I looked at the woman on the ground and decided to stay with her; I would be more helpful that way than chasing a man through a crowded street.

The woman was lying on the ground, and several people were around her, trying to take her shirt off. Desperate to help, some were even trying to wipe the area with cloths, only damaging her skin even more. I grabbed my cellphone and notified the authorities, as well as my team, as I showed my badge and asked these people to back off. I held her hand and soothed her while the ambulance was on its way. I did everything I could do to help. This definitely wasn't my responsibility.

"I'll stay with her."

And yet, I couldn't leave her either.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for all your feedback. It is amazing and I am really grateful for everything!**

 **I know that these chapters are short, but this kind of writing is new to me, so I'm taking it slow as I try to see how it goes.**

 **I am doing a lot of researches about burnings, but still, mistakes can happen and I'm sorry about them. And remember: I don't know much about the health system in the US, so I took some liberties here.**

 **I don't own anything, because if I did, there would be no Will and Jemily would be real since the start ;)**

 **(Also, in this chapter, there is a clue about my other guilty pleasure in the world of TV series :3 )**

 **Second – JJ's POV**

Someone threw acid on me. It's strange when you realize that someone hates you enough to do that to you. This is something so… intimate. The person must know you deep enough in order to want to tear you, destroy you like this…

Of course I knew who'd done this.

I was the media liaison in a small law firm that worked with violent crimes, after all. I knew the profile for attacks like this.

But still, I couldn't say anything…

I knew I should, though.

I knew I should press charges; I should say something to this woman who stood by my side every minute since the attack. I should thank her for keeping me sane.

But I was too busy trying not to scream; I was too busy trying not to cry thinking about the damage on my skin. Trying not to think about the pain that was yet to come.

And, damn, it hurt already! My breath got caught up on my throat, I was afraid to breathe because it meant I would feel _it…_

I wanted to throw up so badly, but I couldn't move. I felt shivers running from the pit of my stomach through my whole body and it took all of my strength to not run away, punch someone or kill myself. So I stood eerily still. If I lost my control just one tiny little bit, I'd lose it all.

I heard the woman enter the room again and resume her place by my side, within my sight, and she took my hand softly.

"Hey there" she whispered. I just blinked.

"It's okay, you don't have to answer. But I wanna talk a little…" she paused for a moment and then continued. "I realized that I never told you my name. I'm Emily. Prentiss. Emily Prentiss."

There were a few moments of silence.

"I can't imagine what you're going through… but I'm here, okay? I don't know if you have someone, I mean, do you? Do you have someone?"

She sighed.

"They are going to transfer you, Jennifer… they can't treat you here. We're going to a burn center"

I didn't miss the use of the word 'we'. Was she coming with me? Why was she doing this?

She must have realized what I was thinking, because she continued quickly.

"I mean, do you want me to go with you? Can I go? I won't go if you don't want me to…"

I felt my heart speed up. I didn't want to be alone; I needed her to go with me.

"Stay…" I managed to whisper.

She was caught md-sentence and looked at me.

"What?"

I almost smiled at her face. Almost.

"Stay, please" I whispered again.

She then smiled.

"I will"

* * *

Water… I could feel… it was different.

Freshness.

It wasn't burning like hell anymore. It was just… burning a lot. But I could feel it was different…

"Jennifer?"

Who was it?

"Is she okay?" That voice I knew. Emily.

"Yes, she is. She's just…" the strange voice said again.

"Detached. She was in so much pain that she detached herself."

I looked around me, more aware of my surroundings. I was in a hospital, but I could see it was another one. There was still IV fluids attached to my arm, and Emily was still there, but everything else was different.

"Hello, Miss Jareau. I take it you're feeling a little better right now. We have administrated a medicine that soothes the itching and the burning sensation."

I looked at him puzzled.

"Who… are you?"

He looked embarrassed for a moment.

"Oh, I'm sorry about that. I'm Doctor Avery and I am the plastic surgeon that's gonna take care of you." He said, smiling. He had beautiful trusting green eyes and a confidence that, in others, may sound as cocky. But it was the confidence I needed.

I nodded at him and closed my eyes; then, I felt a hand caress my hair, softly, but yet, reassuring. Taking a deep breath I opened my eyes again and looked at the doctor, who interpreted this as his clue to continue.

"We are admitting you here and you will be transferred to a specialized room that helps prevent infections, and we will start your treatment." He stopped for a moment and got more serious. I knew it wasn't good. "Unfortunately, you suffered some full thickness burns to your back, which means that all layers of skin were involved and surgery will be needed"

No, no, no. This couldn't be happening. I can't be here.

I felt my breathing rhythm increase and both of them seemed worried.

"Hey, Jennifer, what's wrong?" Emily asked, taking my face in her hands.

"I gotta… get out. I can't be here" I said, while trying to get up and remove the IV tube.

Dr. Avery tried to stop me from doing it, to calm me down, but suddenly my chest hurt and I couldn't breathe.

"Miss Jareau, you gotta stay still, or you may hurt yourself even more"

I couldn't stay here. I had to get out, I had to leave. I felt tears running through my face, and it wasn't because of my burnt skin being stretched from my movements.

"Jennifer, tell me what's wrong, please. Is there someone I can call? Is there something I can do?" Emily asked, but suddenly my world began to spin and I found it hard to focus. I looked beside me and saw nurses injecting something to my IV.

They laid me down again and I searched for Emily and found her eyes by my side, as always. I grabbed her hand and held them tight, even though I could feel the burns on my hand stinging.

"Please" I whispered. "Don't let them… I have no insurance, I can't… I'll lose everything…" and then I faded into darkness.


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Hello guys! Thank you all for your follows/favorites and reviews! Keep them coming!**

 **Yes, another update and yeees, over 1,000 words this time!**

 **Enjoy it ;)**

 **Third – Emily's POV**

I was sitting outside her room, deep in thought. I could feel the anger running through my body and making my hands unconsciously close in a fist. All I could think about was getting my hands in the scumbag that did this to her and make him pay for everything.

I got up and went outside. She would be out of it for a long time and I needed to smoke. I haven't smoke in years… not since…

I lit up the cigar and took a deep breath. Slowly, I felt my hands stop trembling and sighed; this is why I stopped smoking. It is so easy to get addicted to the nicotine; it fills your lungs and goes to your brain and makes everything more bearable. This is shit.

I looked up and threw my cigar away as I saw Hotch and Morgan walking towards me. I had called them and told them what was going on and they said they were coming.

I noticed that Derek looked from my hands to the ground, and wrinkled his nose; he hated cigars. If Hotch noticed something, he didn't mention it, as always.

"Prentiss. What happened?" Hotch asked, always the professional.

I sighed and closed my eyes, remembering one of the most horrible moments of my life; and I've seen enough horrors already.

"I was going home when I heard a man shout the name of a woman on the outside. I looked towards the voice and saw a man throw something, a liquid, on top of her. She fell down screaming. At that moment, I left my vehicle, drawn my gun, but he had already took off through the crowded street. So I stayed with her."

"And what was the liquid?" Morgan offered.

I felt a shiver at his question.

"Acid. He threw acid at her. The doctors think it was sulfuric acid."

"Fuck" I heard Morgan mutter under his breath.

Hotch just looked at me for a moment.

"And what do you want from us?"

I was taken aback by his question.

"What?"

"You could have called the police, pressed charges, you could have reported it to crimes against women division… and yet, you called us. Why?"

I passed my tongue through my dried lips and coughed, buying some time.

"I want us to investigate it"

Morgan snapped his head towards me; I could see what he was thinking. But it was Hotch who spoke.

"You know we don't investigate things like that."

I knew he would say that.

"Well, do we have a case?"

"No"

"Are we supposed to have one?"

"Only if it is an emergency. We've been given some time away from cases to rest."

"So what is the problem?"

Hotch looked at Morgan and then back at me.

"Look" I started, pissed off. "I would like your help, because you are my friends and because you are good damn agents. But if you deny, I will do it myself. I don't need your help to do this; I just want your help." I stopped, kind of shocked about the words I said to my boss. "I will do it anyway"

Hotch took his phone and dialed some number.

"What is her name?"

I looked at him puzzled.

"Jennifer Jareau"

When the person on the other line picked it up, he said.

"Garcia, I need you to check everything you can on 'Jennifer Jareau'; everything, including former boyfriends or guys that she may have had some kind of relationship with. Give the info you find to Emily."

Pause.

"No, Garcia, we don't have a case. This is… different." He then hung up.

"Thanks Hotch, thank you very much."

He just looked at me, as stoic as ever.

"We will talk about this later. Let's get inside; I need to talk to her"

"She is not awake right now, but I can get you her doctor."

Hotch nodded and we all went inside. As we were going towards her room, I saw Dr. Avery arguing in low voice with some old guy in the corner of a hallway. I told Morgan and Hotch to stop, and we stood behind, listening the conversation.

"… if she doesn't have insurance, just send her the bill. Or send her to another hospital" the old man was saying. I wanted to go there and punch this guy on the face, but Morgan put his hand on my shoulder, as if holding me in place.

"I have pro-bono surgeries. I will do it, one way or another" Dr. Avery replied. I really liked him

"Whatever. But you know that with her injuries, one surgery won't be near enough what she needs, as well as you know that a few days in the hospital won't cure her. You can't put it all in your 'pro-bono' hours. The bill will come."

"And we will deal with it when the time comes. But now, I'm going to schedule her _free_ surgery. Sir." And then Dr. Avery walked away.

Hotch looked at us.

"You stay here and wait for Garcia. I will talk to the doctor."

I looked at Morgan and started pacing again and biting my nails.

"What has you so worked up, Prentiss?"

I looked at him dumbfounded.

"Did I tell you that a guy threw acid at a woman? And that she is lying on a hospital bed, severely burned? Did I tell you that I held her hand while she was in shock due to the incredible amount of pain she is in?" I blurted. I didn't know why I was so emotional over this, but I was furious.

"And that is exactly the point!" Morgan answered. "I know that it is horrible, but you don't know this woman. And yet here you are, holding her hand the entire night, wanting to investigate it, losing your head for nothing."

I was so pissed at him right now, I couldn't even find the words to fight back.

"How dare you…"

"You were smoking, Emily! You've stopped smoking years ago and…" he trailed off and we both got silent.

"You're doing it again" he stated simply.

I couldn't take this conversation, not right now.

"Please, don't"

Morgan shook his head.

"You're doing it again and you know it!"

"Morgan, just shut the fuck up! You know nothing about this, just as you knew nothing about that!"

He looked at me sadly and answered softly.

"I know that it almost destroyed you back then. And you're letting it happen again."

I didn't have a chance to reply because my cellphone rang. I answered it without checking the ID.

"Prentiss."

"Well my lovelies, I don't know who this Jennifer Jareau is, but I sure want to give her a hug, because oh-boy." Garcia said loudly. "Where do I even begin?"

But I interrupted before she continued.

"Garcia, just… just give me the basics, where does she work, where does she live, any friends or family that I can contact"

Morgan looked at me and raised an eyebrow.

"O-kay" Garcia replied. "Our beautiful JJ here…"

"JJ?" Morgan asked, amused.

"Yes. I'm not going to keep calling her 'Jennifer Jareau' every time I say her name. This is called 'time saving'. Anyway…" she continued, earning a chuckle from both of us.

"Jayje here works as a media liaison to this small and yet very efficient law firm. It is more like an office than a firm, since there is only one lawyer, Spencer Reid, and her. She deals with all the aspects of releasing information and working the middle field between the office and the court and the media. One could think that since there are just the two of them, this office/firm would be slow or something. But that is where you are wrong, my fine friends! JJ here is like a master of communications and Dr. Reid is a genius, literally. His IQ is 180 and he has an eidetic memory, hence the efficiency of this office that is new, but it's already starting to bother some powerful people."

I sighed. It wasn't much, but it was a beginning.

"Other than this Reid, is there someone else I can contact?"

Garcia answered in a sadder voice.

"Unfortunately, no. Our beautiful blue-eyed girl has no living relatives and no long-term friends that we can contact. It seems like she is pretty lonely…"

There was a moment of silence while we all digested this information.

"Thank you, Garcia, I'll call if we need anything"

"You, my god and goddess of perfectly sculptured bodies, are welcome. Garcia out"

I stood there deep in thought, though I could see Morgan staring at me as if I was the plague or something.

"I can hear your only neuron working from here. Spill out."

Morgan didn't laugh.

"Why didn't you wanna know her personal info?"

I looked at him, annoyed.

"Does the word 'personal' mean anything to you at all?"

He laughed bitterly.

"That's the problem, Prentiss. You wouldn't be bothered by that if it were any other victim. You're doing it again."

And then he walked away.

'Fuck' I muttered, while walking back to her room. This wasn't the same thing.


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Thank you so much for your response, it means the world to me!**

 **And, as the guest already pointed out, Reid indeed has an IQ of 187, sorry for that :X**

 **Enjoy it!**

 **R &R**

 **Fourth**

 _"_ _You are too good to me"_

 _Emily looked at the woman walking beside her, and licked her ice cream. It was a nice Sunday evening; the sun was shining through the trees, but it wasn't too hot. It was a perfect day for a walk by the Potomac River._

 _"_ _No one can ever be 'too good' for someone. Either they are good or they aren't. End of story" Emily answered, with a light grin on her face._

 _The woman smiled._

 _"_ _You are the exception to this rule" She said, and lifted up her sleeves a little. She always wore pants and long sleeves, no matter how the weather was. Emily hated that she felt the need to do it._

 _Emily herself was wearing a light blue dress and flip flops, feeling more relaxed in this warm day._

 _"_ _That doesn't really make sense. If there really is an exception to every rule, then that makes it a rule itself and…"_

 _Emily was interrupted with a peek to the cheek. Any thought that was in her head vanished instantly._

 _"_ _You are really silly. And a nerd. Gosh, do you have a whole collection of Star Wars too?" the woman said laughing, but then stopped when Emily stood serious._

 _"_ _Well, I do have one of those masks that turns your voice into Darth Vader's…"_

 _They both stared at each other for a moment and started laughing. Then, Emily lifted up her hand and caressed the woman's cheek._

 _"_ _You could come with me, you know?"_

 _But the woman just shook her head._

 _"_ _You know I can't"_

 _They just kept walking in silence._

 _"_ _I gotta go now…"_

 _Emily smiled sadly. She didn't know if she was able to keep doing this… every time this woman walked away, she took a piece of her… she didn't know if she had anything left to give._

 _The woman stopped walking and held her arm softly._

 _"_ _Emily, I…"_

 _"_ _No" Emily interrupted. "I know, just… call me if you need anything."_

 _The woman looked at her sadly, but Emily was busy fidgeting with her ice cream._

 _"_ _I'm sorry" she whispered, and walked away, leaving Emily alone once more._

* * *

"What are you thinking about?"

"What?" Emily was pulled back from her thoughts and was met by a pair of deep blue eyes looking at her.

"Sorry" JJ said. "It's just that I've woken up for a while and you were completely out of it. Curiosity finally got the best of me…" she explained, apologetically.

"Oh, don't worry about it" Emily dismissed. "How are you feeling?"

JJ didn't fail to notice how she didn't answer her question.

"Like I'm swimming in a pool of boiling water, which is better than before, when I felt like I was having a chat with the Devil in his mansion in Hell." She said with a half-smile.

Emily smiled, thinking it was a good sign that she was talking more and making jokes, albeit grotesque ones.

"Good. That is very good."

They were silent for a moment and Emily found herself looking intently at those eyes. They were interrupted when Dr. Avery entered the room.

"Hello, Mrs Jareau. It's good to see you awake"

"I have to disagree with you. I'd give anything to be unconscious right now…" she chuckled softly.

"I know that…" he said sadly. "And I'm sorry to say that your pain won't go away soon, but we do have to start working so we can get there as soon as possible, okay?"

JJ closed her eyes for a moment, wishing to be anywhere but here. She wanted to go back in time so desperately. She should have stayed in her office until later, just like she always did. But today she had chosen to get out earlier, wishing to rest a little bit in the comfort of her small apartment. Or was it yesterday? She didn't know what time it was.

"Okay" she whispered.

Dr. Avery continued.

"I'm going to perform a surgical debridement of your injury in order to remove dead tissue and get rid of any kind of dirt or anything that can cause infection." He paused, waiting to see if they were following. They nodded.

"Unfortunately, since the area of your injury is too large, we will not be able to remove all of it in just one procedure…"

"But I can't stay here; I thought that you were going…" JJ trailed off, not knowing what to say.

"Don't worry about it now. This surgery will be a part of my pro-bono hours, so you don't have to pay for anything."

"But you said that there will be other procedures…" she was starting to panic.

Her job was so recent that neither she nor Spencer was able to find health insurance, and she definitely couldn't pay for her treatment. She barely had enough money to pay for her small apartment and her personal needs.

She felt Emily cover her hand with her own, and say softly.

"Hey, we will deal with it when the time comes, okay? You just stay strong and focus on this surgery"

Emily gave her a warm smile and nodded at the doctor.

"We will be giving you now a local anesthetic and I will be back in about 40 minutes to do the procedure." He, then, got closer to JJ and said comfortingly. "I know that this is scary. And I'm not going to lie to you, it will hurt, even with the anesthesia. And it will still hurt once the procedure is over. But we have to do this to start your healing process and to fully achieve it with no after effects"

JJ swallowed hard, her mouth suddenly dry.

"I'm going to call the nurses and they will hook you up to some monitors to check your BP, your oxygen levels and all that stuff. I'll be back soon" Dr. Avery smiled and left the room, just as the nurses got in and attached all the machines.

Emily looked at JJ and could see her getting more anxious every moment.

"Hey, do you like Star Wars?"

JJ was surprised for a moment.

"I… can't say that I don't. Why?" she asked puzzled.

"Well, it's because I have this collection of… toys." At this moment, JJ was already smiling. "And, well, let's just say that it may be harming my credibility as an… adult."

"Oh, I wonder why is that…" the blonde said almost to herself, but making sure that Emily could hear her.

"You are such a tease…" she said shaking her head jokingly. "Anyway… I want to give it away, because I can't say how many dates it already screwed up." She finished laughing.

"Well" JJ started, serious. "So you are trying to date the wrong person." They stood in silence for a moment, until JJ added, grinning. "But if you like, there's this guy down my apartment, I think you two could be great. I've never seen him in person, but I can _hear_ him talking in his online games all the time, and he seems like a… unique man."

"You do know that, no matter how flattering it is, I can't date anyone under the age of 18, right?"

They both laughed and JJ pretended to get serious again.

"Really? Then should I worry about that time with that really cute…"

"Please, don't say anything! I don't wanna go to jail because of you. Besides, I'm an agent. Everything that you say that isn't legal, I am forced to report."

"Really?" JJ asked, furrowing her brow. "Well, then that excludes some topics of conversation that we could have…"

Emily couldn't stop grinning at her.

"Oh, you dirty girl…"

Emily felt her cell phone vibrate in her pocket, but ignored it. This was more important.

Dr. Avery then walked into the room and interrupted their conversation.

"So, are you ready to start?"

"Yes" JJ said carefully. "Can Emily stay?" she asked, almost whispering. But then, a flash of insecurity crossed her eyes and she looked at Emily. "I mean, you've already done so much for me. If you don't want…" she trailed off, not knowing exactly how to voice her concerns.

Emily felt her phone vibrate in her pocket again; it was probably her team looking for her. Ignoring it one more time, she answered confidently.

"Of course I'll stay, you didn't even have to ask" she looked briefly at Dr. Avery, who nodded at her.

But if Emily knew what was about to happen, she wouldn't be so certain. As soon as the doctor started the procedure, JJ gasped and closed her eyes shut, tears instantly streaming down her face.

"Shh… it's gonna be all right, I'm here with you, Jen…" Emily tried to comfort her.

She looked at the doctor, worried.

"Shouldn't the meds be working right now?"

Dr. Avery looked at her and shook his head.

"They _are_ working, trust me"

Emily swallowed, trying to undo the knot in her throat, and continued to stroke JJ's hair. As the doctor proceeded to cut the damaged skin, it inevitably cut some of the healthy skin also, and blood started to flow.

"Put pressure here" Dr. Avery instructed the nurse.

As soon as pressure was applied, JJ hissed in pain.

"Fuck" she muttered, biting her lips.

Emily had tears in her eyes, watching the scene helplessly.

"Couldn't you put her under general anesthesia to do this?"

"It would be an unnecessary risk, we would have to intubate her to prevent respiratory distress, and that is a very invasive procedure…"

"Unnecessary?" Emily asked in disbelief. "Look at the pain she's in!"

Dr. Avery looked at her with understanding eyes.

"She wouldn't be really free of pain. She just wouldn't be able to voice it."

And that silenced Emily and got her wondering if her distress was really due to the pain this woman was in or if it was just her own discomfort towards this situation. Was she empathetic or selfish?

"Emily, it's okay… just… fuck" JJ whispered.

Emily looked at her and tried to distract her.

"You know, I don't think that it was the Star War toys that made all my dates run for the hills. I think I spooked them. I'm just not sure if they were the right person, you know?" She said, trying to distract the blonde, and then continued.

"But maybe, when we get out of here, you can help me with that. I know that I am the profiler, but you are waay more… experienced… as far as I know…" Emily slowed down when she heard the beeping of the machine get unsteady. "What is happening? Jen, are you okay?"

But Jennifer didn't answer, just stared blankly at something.

"Her BP is rising" the nurse said.

"And her oxygen is dropping…" the doctor muttered.

Emily cupped JJ's face in her hands and tried to get her attention.

"Jen? Honey, just look at me" but the blonde didn't respond. Instead, Emily noticed how ragged her breathing was.

"I think she is…"

"At the verge of an anxiety crisis" Dr. Avery finished her sentence. "It's very common on painful procedures." He said, and then instructed the nurse to clean the blood and do the bandages. "I think that's enough. For now."

Then, he headed towards her and said softly.

"Hey, Jennifer. Can I call you Jennifer? I know that you are lost somewhere in your own head, and I'm sorry that you had to do this in order to face the procedure. But you did great here, do you hear me? And I promise that all this pain, all this suffering, it will end. And we are going to get through this together, okay? Now you just rest. I'll give you something for you to relax" he finished, and looked at Emily.

"I'll be back in a few moments. Just try to keep her calm, she will be constantly monitored." And then he walked away.

Emily indeed liked him.

"Hey, I'm here with you. It's okay now…" she whispered, and she saw how the blonde started to calm a little bit. Eventually, out of sheer exhaustion, she fell asleep.

Emily let out a breath she didn't know she was holding; and then she walked out of the room. She had something to do.


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Hey there. Thank you so much for your support and I am so sorry it took me this long to update. It happened for one simple reason: I was stuck, not with the story, but with the way I want to write it. Because I have two main characters here, with their own lives and their own stories to tell, and their paths have never crossed before. And it is already complicated to deal with flashbacks for just one character, let alone for two. Because you can't just throw these flashbacks, you can't just throw the information in the chapter and think that it will work. It has to be well constructed and it has to be connected to what you're about to tell in your chapter, otherwise it becomes commonplace. Yes, there are no flashbacks in this chapter, but I thought about it and then decided to use it in another moment.**

 **I hope you like this chapter and pleeease, your feedback is really important to me!**

 **R &R**

 **Fifth**

JJ woke up slowly and looked around, unconsciously looking for Emily; but she found someone completely different.

"Spence?"

He got up from his chair and got closer to her, running his hands through his messy hair.

"Hey, Jen. How are you feeling?" he asked, seeing the bandages that adorned her hands and back. There were drops of blood staining the white bandages and the mere sight of them made his stomach turn.

"I'm okay…" she said, trying to dismiss her situation.

He couldn't believe this was happening. Just the day before they were working together and now…

"Hey, it's okay Spence. You don't need to worry…"

He furrowed his brow, not understanding why she was the one comforting him.

"But… you were attacked, brutally attacked. You went through one of the most painful procedures and you were alone… I should have been here with you."

She shook her head slowly.

"You couldn't have known, Spence…"

He started to look over her vital signs and she chuckled. Of course he would do this; he was Spencer Reid, after all.

"Have you pressed charges?" he asked suddenly, taking her by surprise.

"Hm no, I haven't. Not yet." She answered unsure. She knew she had to, though.

"Do you know who did this?"

"No" she said, and she wasn't really lying. She thought she knew who'd done this, but she wasn't so certain now… he had crossed some boundaries, yes, but did that mean he was some sadistic man that could do something so cruel like this?

"Are you sure? Because attacks like this are usually committed by a former boyfriend or someone that was rejected, romantically speaking. Is there someone that fits these criteria?"

"Reid, I am too tired right now to do this…"

"Okay… sorry" he said, and then both got silent.

JJ closed her eyes, gritting her teeth as the meds started to wear off and the itching started to make her nervous.

The sound of Spencer hitting his foot on the floor didn't help either.

"What?" she asked sharply.

The sound stopped immediately and his head shot up towards her. He had an apologetic look on his face and she instantly felt bad for snapping at him. She didn't know how this socially inept guy could be such a brilliant lawyer.

She smiled at him the best way she could.

"Sorry. But I can hear your brain working from here. Tell me what you're thinking."

"I will be your lawyer" he said with no hesitance.

"What?" she asked, caught completely off guard.

"I'm your friend, Jen, you know that… You need a lawyer"

"Spence… I appreciate it, but I know the authorities are doing their work and they'll arrest him… " she objected lamely.

"Jen, you of all people should know that that's not how it works! He's going to trial, but you know how defense lawyers are! They will canvass your whole life and they will find a way to somehow justify this scumbag's actions and say that you are to blame! It's like an arena there, Jen, and I won't let you get hurt anymore" he finished his speech and blushed, uncomfortable for letting his emotions take over him.

But he didn't regret a word he said.

He wouldn't let her face this trial alone; he wouldn't let her get more hurt than she already was. She shouldn't have to worry about this in the middle of her recovery.

"Spence…" JJ said, with tears in her eyes. She didn't know what to say.

"Jennifer, I represent victims of violent crimes. You _were_ a victim of a violent crime, and you have nothing to be ashamed of. The sooner you accept this and admit it to yourself, the better"

The blonde sighed and nodded. He was right.

"I'll let you rest right now, but I'll be back…"

"Okay"

And the he left, leaving her alone as the truth of his words weighed on her shoulders. She was a victim of a violent crime. And someone she knew did this to her.

And in the loneliness of this hospital room, she cried. She cried for the life that she had and that would never be the same again; she cried for the pain that hadn't subsided not even for one second; she cried for all the things she would have to face alone.

And she didn't know if she could make it.

* * *

Emily hadn't come back.

She woke up from an uncomfortable sleep after Spencer had left, and Emily still wasn't there. She knew that she shouldn't be surprised, that this woman had already done so much for her. But she couldn't help but wish she was there...

But wishes were just that, wishes. She had learned it the hard way over the years. She promised herself that she wouldn't let anyone in completely the way she had done before; at the time, she ran away and never looked back.

But in a matter of hours, she had broken her promise and found herself looking constantly at the door, waiting for Emily to appear at any moment.

Her brain told her that it was a normal reaction to an extreme situation; that she found someone to comfort her amidst a scary moment. But still, she shouldn't have allowed it.

She moved on the bed and tried to turn on her back, wincing as the burns stung and she felt the injured skin stretch. The bandages were glued to her skin and the smallest of movements made her feel like she was being flayed.

The door opened to reveal Dr. Avery and a nurse that went to check on her.

"Hello, Jennifer. How are you today?"

"Terrific" she answered coldly. She was sleepy and her back hurt and she wanted so desperately to get up and stretch her legs, but not even that she could do. She wasn't exactly in the mood for small talk.

"A bad day, I see. So, I know that this is going to seem a little rushed and you won't like to know that it will hurt again, but I really want you to go home as soon as possible, no offense." He said with a smile that only highlighted his green eyes. "Your recovery will move really faster once you continue your treatment without being hospitalized"

JJ looked at him and her heart started to beat faster, which was registered by the machines. Dr. Avery looked at the monitor and turned to her again.

"We will continue working on the debridement of your wound until we achieve a stage where you can take care of it by yourself. I would like to try enzymatic debridement, to decrease the risk to healthy tissue"

"Enzymatic?" JJ asked, startled.

"Yes"

"But that means that you will prescribe a chemical agent. I am aware of these techniques. This would be fairly expensive…"

"Yes, it may be. But Jennifer, this is one of the fastest ways to treat your wounds and one of the safest for your healthy tissue as well."

"I told you, I can't pay for all of it. I know that I will need long-term medical care and that it will probably take several reconstructive surgeries to… I can't. I want you to do a mechanical debridement."

Dr. Avery was taken aback by this. Mechanical debridement was indeed the cheapest debridement technique available, since it only required gauzes; but it was also the most painful one. No doctor liked doing it and, on top of all, no patient should go through this kind of procedure.

"I thought Emily would be here with you" he said, carefully.

JJ felt her heart tightens at this. She wanted her to be here, but she wasn't. She was on her own now, as it had been her entire life.

"She's not. Why do you ask?"

"It's just… I would like to talk to her about this."

JJ got angry at this. Was he saying that she couldn't make the decisions about her own health? And why did he think he could talk to Emily about it?

"Emily is not related to me in any way. This is my health and I am completely able to make my own decisions. I want the mechanical debridement."

* * *

"Fuck!" Emily muttered.

Another dead end.

She was with Penelope, watching the CCTV cameras for hours, trying to see if they could catch that bastard's face on tape. They tried to follow him after the attack, tried to go backwards and see where he came from, but to no avail. The guy who did this knew the area and knew how to avoid the cameras.

"Em, peaches, you know I could look into her life and try to find something…"

Emily ran her hands through her hair, thinking about this. It would be a lot easier if Garcia did her magic, indeed. But she didn't want to invade JJ's privacy, she didn't want to break the trust that she was still building. She couldn't do that.

"No… not yet, anyway. Let's wait Hotch and Morgan, they will talk to her and we will see if we can do something."

Garcia looked at her suspiciously. Emily was being extra careful with this case, way more than she would be in any other circumstances.

"If you are sure about it…"

If Emily noticed the tone in her voice, she didn't show it. Instead, she shook her head and took a deep breath.

"So, she didn't file a restraining order against anyone, didn't press any charges against anyone… damn it!"

Emily got up and stretched her back, looking at her clock.

"Damn it!"

"What is it, Em?"

"I didn't realize what time is it. I gotta go back to the hospital, Jennifer should be awake by now." She answered, gathering her things and heading to the door.

"Go, I'll keep trying here" Garcia said and looked back at her screen.

* * *

JJ couldn't stand it anymore. She wished so hard that she could pass out right now, but she knew that they would stop the procedure. And then continue when she woke up.

"Jennifer, do you need us to stop?" she heard a voice ask her.

Why did they insist on talking to her when she could barely hear them? All her energy was on the simple task of breathing.

"No, keep going."

She could ask them to stop, though. She could ask them to put her under general anesthesia, but she didn't have any money. She didn't have any savings, since she always had to take care of herself. She couldn't even afford what she already owed this hospital, let alone the additional procedures. No, it had to be this way.

The beeping from the machines increased, following her heart rate. When she felt them pulling the gauze, taking her skin with it, she allowed herself to shed her tears.

"Jennifer…"

"Keep. Going."

She couldn't back down now. The hand of a nurse slipped, pulling the gauze way more abrupt than normal.

"Sorry…"

But JJ knew that no matter how quickly her recovery was, she would still be in the hospital for a long time. The burnings covered almost her entire back, from the tip of her neck to the small of her back. Her hands were also injured, from when she tried to protect her face.

There was still the risk of infection, and the doctors had to remove all the dead tissue before she could even start thinking about reconstructive surgeries.

Procedures that she couldn't afford.

Procedures that would bring her pain.

Procedures that would take a long time to be completed.

The gauze opened what should have been a blister, and she gritted her teeth.

"Fuck" she muttered.

She wanted so badly to hold someone's hand, Emily's hand. She wanted so badly to hear her soft voice soothing her, her eyes looking at her and keeping her sane…

"Stop! Please, stop!" she said, feeling something building up inside her.

They stopped immediately and went to her side. The nurse, realizing what was about to happen, grabbed a bowl and handed it to her. JJ threw up and, unable to stop her muscles from contracting, she closed her eyes and just wished it was all over.

Maybe she should back down.

Maybe she should just give up.

* * *

Emily arrived at JJ's room and it was strangely quiet. Thinking she was asleep, Emily pulled a chair by her side and sat down, massaging her temples. All the stress from the last day plus the hours she had spent working a case with the team before she witnessed this cruelty were catching up with her.

With her eyes closed and focused on her pain, she was surprised when she heard a low and yet a clear voice.

"Do you know how mechanical debridement works?"

Emily looked up suddenly.

"Hey, Jen… I didn't know you were awake. Are you okay? What did you say?"

"Do you know how mechanical debridement works?" JJ repeated.

"Uhm… I've heard about it, but I'm not familiar with the details. Why?"

"It's pretty simple, actually. They apply wet gauzes on top of the damaged skin and wait for them to dry, which makes the skin get stuck on them. Then, they pull out the gauzes, ripping the skin in the process. And the procedure is done again and again, until all the dead tissue is removed."

Emily stood in silence and looked at her. She had a strange look on her face; her eyes were glazed in something she couldn't see. It was almost as if she was talking without even being aware of it.

"And all the time I was thinking that… I was thinking if it was worth it… to keep on fighting… because I…" and then she stopped talking and kept staring ahead, trapped in her own mind.

And for the second time in her life, seeing this woman slowly lose the will to fight, Emily felt utterly powerless. Just like it happened before. But she couldn't let Jennifer end up like her. She just couldn't.

And she wouldn't.


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: Thank you all for your amazing support! I know that I say this every chapter, but it's because you are amazing in every chapter, so...**

 **I hope you enjoy this and just remember that English is not my first language, and any mistakes are all mine!**

 **Also, I didn't want to portray JJ too bitchy here, but she suffered a severe trauma, and there are psychological consequences to that. Again, all mistakes are mine ;-)**

 **And of course I own nothing, otherwise Jemily would definitely be a thing.**

 **Please, R &R!**

 **Sixth**

 _She couldn't breathe. He was choking her with one arm pressing her neck, while his other hand roamed through her body. He had her pinned onto a wall and she could feel blood seeping from her forehead, from when he slammed her into that brick wall. She could also feel his hardness behind her._

 _"_ _Now you're not so bitchy anymore, huh? What, faking that you don't want me, while at the beginning was really fun, now it's just a pain in the ass. Why don't you just say at once that you want me?"_

 _She couldn't breathe; she couldn't speak. She was already starting to feel her limbs going numb._

 _"_ _Say it!" He ordered, while his hand pressed her breasts roughly. "Say IT!" He repeated, and then bit her ear. She whimpered a little, surprised by it, but didn't say a word. Even if she could say something, she wouldn't give him the pleasure._

 _Then, he started to run his hand down through her body, until she felt him uncomfortably approaching the hem of her jeans. No, no, no, not this, please._

 _She tried to kick and punch, but the lack of oxygen was making her weak. Although she could breathe enough not to pass out, it wasn't enough for her to fight. The knock to her head didn't help it either._

 _He started to undo the buttons of her pants and she heard his voice on her ear._

 _"_ _Do you wanna have kids, honey? Huh?" His hands were inside her now and she could feel him playing with her panties. "I could make you one, what do you think? I'm sure he would have the looks" he said, and when she felt his hand putting her panties aside, she allowed the first tear escape. "Because I'm not so bad, and you are fucking gorgeous, you know that?"_

 _And when he pulled his hand out of her and opened his own zipper, they heard voices._

 _"_ _Fuck!" he muttered._

 _He choked her harder and put his other hand on her mouth, to prevent her from screaming. When the voices had vanished, he smiled and started to pull her jeans down. But then there were voices again, and they could hear them walking in their direction._

 _"_ _Fuck them and their stupid parties!" he hissed, and then pushed her to the ground._

 _"_ _Don't forget me so easy, babe" he said and ran away, leaving her on the ground._

* * *

Derek watched Emily intently as they interviewed Jennifer in her hospital room. The agent was sitting next to the blonde and had a protective body language the whole time. He wasn't happy with the way this was going.

"Ms. Jareau, I know this is hard, but everything you can tell us is useful. Did you have any boyfriend in the past?"

JJ looked at both men in the room. The one who was speaking to her had a low and yet firm voice; his expression never changing throughout their interaction. The other one was a muscular man, and she could tell that he was watching her and Emily suspiciously. Boyfriend, maybe? She didn't know, but there was something off about him.

"No, none."

The older man – Agent Hotchner – looked at her incredulously.

"Not even some guy who was interested in you, but you gave no attention to him?"

JJ bit her lips. Was he able to do something like this? She didn't know… but from what he did to her, he deserved to be checked. But at the same time, it was in college, a few years ago, and in another state! Was it possible…

"Ms. Jareau, anything can be useful" Agent Hotchner said, interrupting her thoughts. "Don't worry about what it may seem, you just tell us and we check it, to see if it's possible or not." He finished, seemingly reading her mind.

"I… it's just…" JJ sighed. "It was a few years ago. In college, there was this guy who was always trying to make out with me. He was always hitting on me in public and he was even a little… rude in parties when he drank too much. He was a real jerk" she stopped and took a deep breath. Emily instantly took her hand and caressed it, encouraging her to continue, which didn't go unnoticed by Derek.

"Until one day he actually scared me. It was late at night, I had been working late in some project, and I was walking back from campus to my dorm. He came behind me and he dragged me to… he dragged me to some ally and he…" she trailed off, remembering one of the scariest moments of her life.

"Jennifer… did he sexually assaulted you?" Derek chimed in, now completely engrossed in the interview.

"No, yes, I mean…" sighing again, JJ closed her eyes trying to gather her thoughts.

"Jen, you don't have to do this right now if you're not up to it…" Emily soothed her.

Derek looked at her disapprovingly. They didn't say that to someone who could hold some kind of valuable information. A glass of water, yes; maybe a few minutes to clear her head. But they didn't give the opportunity to do it other day.

"No, it's okay, thanks" JJ said and smiled at her. "He didn't rape me. Some people passed nearby and he got scared and ran away. But he… he did assault me. He… choked me a little… when I got to my dorm, my roommate was so pissed. She wanted me to report him."

"And why didn't you? If someone attacks you this bad, you report them" Derek said, a little too harsh.

"Derek!" Emily said

"Emily, it's okay… he just don't get it. After all, he is a man, a strong man, he doesn't have to face what we have to face. To be afraid that the guy who assaulted you could come back, to face all the judgment, the looks, the fault…he'll never have to face it. So he judges. Just like everybody else does." She finished, glaring at him. What was his problem, anyway?

"Derek, why don't go get us some water?" Hotch said.

Derek knew he had made a mistake; he had let a personal factor interfere with his work. So he just nodded and head out the door.

"I'm sorry for that. But I do have to ask, why didn't you report him?" Hotch continued.

"Because… I was a freshman, he was a senior. I was on a scholarship and he, on the other hand, had all the money of the world. He was really rich, the star of the football team… you have no idea how many crimes happen in campus that don't get investigated. How many girls are attacked and their attackers get away with it. I just knew that they would dismiss my charges and I would probably suffer retaliation for it."

"And why did you hesitate to tell us this?"

"Because… it was years ago, in another state… I don't think he was that fixated on me to follow me here and… I don't know."

Hotch nodded his head.

"I understand, but we are going to check it anyway. What is his name?"

JJ shook her head. She wanted nothing more than just forget about this man.

"Hastings. Michael Hastings"

* * *

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Emily asked, angry.

She was pissed at Derek for the way he behaved while interviewing JJ. It was unprofessional and cruel, and she wanted to punch him in the face for that.

"Look, Prentiss. I know what I did in there was wrong, and I am sorry. But I don't want to talk about it."

"The hell you won't talk about it! You were unprofessional and mean! You were mean in there! This is not you! So again, what the hell is wrong with you?"

Derek looked at her and ran his hand through his head. He knew this was getting to him, but he wouldn't let Emily go through that again.

"I care about you, Emily. And I am seeing you do that again! You're getting too attached; it's getting too personal… I get that you saw the whole thing and you are way too good to not support her, but she should have told you to get lost by now! She is taking advantage of your presence and your kindness and I don't like it"

Emily looked at him dumbfounded.

"What? Taking advan… you are completely out of your mind! I should go to Hotch and tell him that you are no longer capable of working this case…"

Derek lost his temper at this.

"What? Emily, you were completely destroyed that time! That woman came into your life and took away everything from you! Your confidence, your pride, she almost cost you your life!"

"Don't you dare say anything about her!" Emily shouted at him. "You don't have the right! None of what happened was her fault; it was all on him, that bastard!"

"Emily… I watched you die! You were dead on my arms for a moment! You may not notice it yet, but I can see the looks, I can see the way you act around this woman. You are way too cautions, you won't look into her life as we always do on each case. You haven't even gone to your house ever since this incident happened!"

"Incident?" Emily asked, outraged. "You call this an incident? You jerk! What if it were you? If you had been attacked with sulfuric acid and your skin was melting and you were going through innumerous painful procedures, you would want someone by your side!"

He looked at her and sighed.

"Look, I know I was a jerk in there. She didn't deserve it. I'm sorry; I will also apologize to her. But Emily, please… be careful. I can't stand if something like that happens again."

She looked at him, anger written all over her face. She knew she would regret this later, but at the time, she simply did not give a damn.

"You don't get to tell me what to do. You don't get to tell me how to act. You don't get anything."

And then she left.

* * *

 _Tick-tack._

 _Tick-tack_

 _Jennifer!_

 _Tick-tack_

 _Splash_

 _Fire!_

 _But… there's no smoke. Get up! Run! Blood. Pain._

 _You're melting. Tick-tack. Liquefying yourself on a sidewalk, going back to where you belong and from where you should have never left. The gutter. Murderer. You're gonna rot in hell. Just like your…_

 _Splash!_

 _Tick-tack._

 _You deserve it, you bitch! Think you can tease me like that and then say no to me? You dyke!_

 _Tick-tack._

 _I would never hurt you that way, Jenny…_

 _Tick._

 _Tack._

 _The clock is ticking._

 _Pain._

 _Jen, honey, I'm here with you._

 _My skin is melting._

 _I'm gonna die._

 _Jen, open your gorgeous eyes for me._

 _Do you wanna have kids?_

 _Jennifer, wake up, please._

 _Maybe I could make you one_

 _Jennifer!_

 _Splash._

She woke up violently, though no sound came out of her. She felt hands on her and, not recognizing where she was, panicked and tried to get rid of them, pulling the wires that were connected to her body.

"Jen, I'm not going to touch you, but you gotta stay still."

JJ knew that voice. That voice meant safeness.

She looked up and saw Emily standing in front of her, holding her hands up in a non-threatening way.

"That's it Jen, you are okay, you are in the hospital, remember?"

JJ looked around, trying to clear her foggy mind.

"Yeah, I…"

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Emily asked, kindly.

But JJ just shook her head. "No, I… it… it is a long story" she almost whispered.

Then, she laid back down again on her bed, and Emily sit by her side.

"It's okay, you will be okay. Go back to sleep, I'll be here with you."

But JJ didn't quite believe her. She didn't know if she would ever be okay again; she didn't know if she wanted to be okay, if she wanted to keep going. But she was too tired to think about it now. She just wanted to sleep and knowing that Emily was with her gave her the comfort she needed. For now.

* * *

Saying that JJ hated hospitals was an understatement. She despised them, when it came to her own health. She had to stay in the hospital more than a day only two times in her life, both times when she was a kid. The first time was when she got pneumonia and she was admitted for a couple of days; and the other one was when she was ten years old and had to undergo a surgery to treat appendicitis. She was extremely irritated, both times.

Now, entering her seventh day of being trapped in that room, she was almost climbing the walls. She had to get out of there, and she would do it today. She had accepted now the fact that her life was over and that she would have to work the rest of her life to pay what she owed. But she couldn't let the bill grow even more, and she was adamant on leaving today, even if it meant signing an AMA form.

So, when Dr. Avery entered the room, followed closely by Emily, who was carrying two cups of coffee, they were shocked to see her standing beside the bed, with her things packed in a bag – which had taken her a long time to finish.

"Jen?" Emily was the first to speak.

"Jennifer, this is not a good position to be in. Your wounds are still healing and any sudden movement can make them worse…"

"I'm leaving today" she stated simply, ignoring both of them.

They stood still for a moment, too shocked to say something, until Dr. Avery came out of the stupor first and tried to reason with her.

"Jennifer, you do know that your injuries are severe, right? You are facing risk of infection every day, that's why we've been cleaning and changing the dresses on your wounds regularly."

JJ smiled politely at him.

"Yes, I am aware of the risks and I thank your efforts and your care, but I still want to go. Is there something I have to sign?" she said, in her professional tone, making it clear that she wouldn't back down.

"Jennifer, I know that being in the hospital is something awful and stressing, but unfortunately, you still need several days before I can release you…"

"That is why it's called 'AMA'. Otherwise, it would just be 'discharge papers'" She said, a little harsh.

Then, Emily stepped up and said, in a low tone.

"Dr. Avery, would you excuse us for a second, please?"

The kind doctor nodded and left the room.

"Why are you doing this, Jennifer?"

JJ sighed, angry. Why couldn't they just accept her decisions? It was her body, her health, ergo her call.

"Why do you care?" she asked, harsh.

She knew she was being unfair to Emily, the person who stood by her side this whole time. But she was so… angry… that she couldn't hold it anymore. Fuck the man who did this to her, fuck the doctors for keep hurting her like that, fuck Emily for being nice and gentle in a way that she didn't deserve…

Fuck the pain.

And fuck her.

Fuck her for not being able to see the face of the bastard, nor being able to recognize his voice…

She didn't even remember what happened, for Christ sake! It was all a big blur in her head, nothing made sense.

She was useless.

She was disgusting.

She deserved it.

 _You're nothing! You should be dead! You! You piece of shit!_

"I care about you because… because… I just do" Emily said, hurt by what JJ said. "Jennifer, I saw everything! It was one of the scariest moments of my life and you… you were there on the floor…" she trailed off, not finding the words to express the fear and desperation she felt at that moment.

 _Nobody loves you here, nobody ever did, you little brat!_

"Oh, I see. You're still around just to appease your conscience, so you can lie down at night and think about how good of a person you are"

 _Why don't you just kill yourself? You, nobody would miss._

Emily thought about answering, but what could she say? So she just stood there in silence, for several minutes.

A silence that was unnerving JJ and making her feel awful about what she said.

"I'm sorry Emily, I just… I'm tired. And angry, I guess, but not at you, just… in general."

Emily shook her head and smiled sadly, trying to get past the hard words that were said.

"It's okay, I get it. But Jen… why do you want to leave now?"

JJ shook her head and looked up, embarrassed by the situation.

"I can't pay for this, Emily… Spence and I, we're… we are new to this, our company, I mean…"JJ started, tripping over her words. "We didn't have time to look for an insurance company and I just…" she sighed in frustration. "Between my apartment and my personal needs, I just… I don't even have a car" she whispered the last part, embarrassed to share her financial failure to Emily, a person that she didn't really know and that seemed to have a lot of money, judging by her clothes.

Emily wasn't fancy, not at all; she dressed pretty simple, actually. But in these few days, JJ couldn't help to notice how elegant Emily was. Her clothes were all of good quality. Simple, but expensive. In a way that JJ could tell that Emily wasn't one to bribe about her money, no, she was just used to going to expensive stores, even if she picked the most regular outfits.

She liked that about her.

Emily waited until JJ looked at her again and asked, softly.

"You don't have anyone that could…"

"No…"JJ interrupted, not in a harsh way, but in a sad one.

They stood in silence again, until Emily spoke calmly.

"I could pay it for you"

JJ looked at her and tried not to be upset about it. She was just trying to be nice, right?

 _You're pathetic. Everyone thinks so._

"What?" she asked, her voice a little colder than she intended as she tried to hold back her thoughts.

Emily was quick to shake her head.

"No, that came out wrong. What I meant is… how are you going to pay for this? I don't want to pry; I'm just trying to show you how right I am"

JJ chuckled softly at this.

"I will… make a loan, I guess." JJ sighed, thinking of how broke she would be soon.

"So, why can't you make a loan from me? You would pay me in the same way that you would pay your bank, but without interest – you know how they will make your debt even higher – and it would be in a much more friendly and trusting way" she said and smiled, and JJ couldn't help but smirk at her.

"And what would you get from it?" JJ asked, still smirking.

"Oh, you know" Emily shrugged. "I would be happy to get you treated. And then I would lie down at night and think about how good of a person I am, of course." She finished, feigning seriousness.

JJ laughed at her and Emily also smiled, happy to see a laid-back moment in JJ's gorgeous eyes.

"Emily…" JJ called, getting serious again. "It would take years for me to pay you back. Decades, maybe…"

"Then you would be stuck with me for decades, what a shame" she answered, smiling. "At least you would have the time to tell me that long story you mentioned the other day" Emily continued, winking at her.

JJ chuckled again, feeling something in her chest – which she couldn't quite comprehend – watching Emily's adorable facial expressions. And she still had that silly smile on her beautiful face…

"I… have to think about it" JJ said, still unsure.

"Why don't you stay here, just one more night, and if tomorrow you decide to decline my amazing offer, we can think of something." Emily said, hopeful.

JJ looked at her and, seeing her eyes shining, she knew she didn't really want to say anything other than…

"Okay."


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey guys, sorry it took so long to update this. I wanna thank you all for your support, your reviews and follows mean the world to me! Thank you!**

 **Just some things that I want to remind you: English is not my first language and I don't have a beta, so all mistakes are mine. Also, I've looked a lot into informations on burn victims and all kinds of treatment and possible complications; but still, I am no doctor or anything related, so there probably are some mistakes here and I took some liberties in order to write this chapter. I hope you can understand this.**

 **So here it is, have fun! R &R!**

 **Seventh**

As soon as he left the hospital, Derek entered in his car and started driving. It would take up to four hours for him to arrive at his destination, but he didn't mind. He wouldn't have to work until the following day and he had to do this. For years he has been driving up this same path whenever he can, only so he can sit in that chair and comfort himself in the fact that _his_ life has turned into hell.

As he parked his car outside the USP Lewisburg, he breathed in the cool November air and closed his eyes, trying to control his temper. He couldn't lose his composure in there, in front of _him._ He couldn't let him know that until now he was affected by him and by what he had done. Derek would rather die before give him the pleasure.

He then stepped out of the car and locked the door, putting his keys in his pockets as he turned to face the gate that led him inside the walls that were holding him in. As he started to make his way into the prison, feeling the chilly weather and seeing the leaves on the floor, he noticed that it was on a day exactly like this when he walked up this path for the first time, a few years ago. But his rage, however, remained the same as it was during that first eventful encounter.

 _Derek Morgan had never been angrier in his entire life. He was angry at the man he would be seeing in a few moments, he was angry at his best friend, Emily Prentiss, for putting herself in danger again and, mostly, he was angry at himself, for he had failed her. And that had almost cost her life._

 _A door was opened and two armed guards brought a man in. He had handcuffs on his hands and on his feet, and when he sat down, the guards tied him up to the table. He was completely unable to move._

 _Derek looked at the man before him with great disgust. Even in prison, he still had an arrogance that made Morgan want to punch him in the face. But he would regret the day he thought about laying his filthy hands on her friend; that Derek Morgan would make sure of._

 _"_ _Oh, you're that bitch's body guard. I knew you were familiar. How is she, by the way?"_

 _The bastard wasn't even in the room for thirty seconds and Morgan already wanted to slit his throat open. But of course, his expression was a cold as ice._

 _"_ _You know, she is pretty good, actually. But I am better." Morgan answered. He knew that this son of a bitch, being the manipulative bastard he was, would taunt him with comments about Emily. But Morgan was ready for that._

 _"_ _Oh yeah?" the man said, grinning. "And why is that?"_

 _"_ _I'm just thinking about how much you're gonna suffer in here."_

 _Derek watched with pleasure while as the man's eyes trembled slightly, although his grin never disappeared from his face._

 _"_ _Well, I think one of my biggest qualities I that I know how to laugh at my own expense. But do you care to enlighten me on that, please?"_

 _Derek got up from his chair, knowing that the lack of an answer would annoy him. He walked up to him and, looking at his eyes while standing, in a way that he could show this bastard that he was the man in charge there, he said, slowly._

 _"_ _I know a lot of people in this world. So does Emily. You messed with the wrong woman and you will pay for it. Do you know what happens to men like you in here? Do you know what happens to men who do what you did to women?"_

 _The man shifted in his chair and answered, trying to keep the upper hand in the conversation._

 _"_ _I have my charm, detective. Those idiots in there don't know everything and…" but he didn't have a chance to finish, as Derek interrupted._

 _"_ _Oh, but they will. I will make sure of that. They will know every single thing you did to women, and more. I told you I know a lot of people in here. And I will spent every moment while you are here making sure that your life becomes a living hell." Morgan started walking towards the door but then stopped. "Oh, and one more thing: it's agent."_

 _And then Derek left._

Derek sat on that same chair and waited for a few moments. The door was opened and two guards brought him in, exactly like years ago. They handcuffed him onto the table and got out of the room.

Morgan took his time looking at the bastard. He seemed to have aged decades in the last few years. He was thinner; he had dark bags under his eyes and a lot of injuries covering his face. He had definitely been beaten. That put a grim on Morgan's face.

"Yeah, yeah. Laugh at me, whatever. I don't care" he said. "How's our pretty friend doin', by the way?"

The agent just shook his head, still grinning. This idiot was living in a hellhole and he still wanted to control the situation.

"How are _you_ doing?" Derek asked, stressing the word 'you' so he would know exactly what he was talking about. "Having fun with your fellas?"

But the man just stared at him. Derek then continued.

"I told you when you first got here that this would be fun, didn't I? I am a man of my word."

The man sat straighter on his chair and leaned forward, talking in a low voice.

"You think you won this, detective? You think just because right now I am here, in this hellhole, that you and your little bitch are free? You have no idea what awaits you."

Derek rose from his seat.

"We did win this, actually. And you can whine whatever you want, but you will never see the light of day again, and you will never come near us again. And for the last time, it is _agent._ "

And once more, Morgan walked out of that building feeling some comfort in the fact that this monster was still behind bars.

* * *

JJ woke up the next morning feeling a little lightheaded. The long stay in the hospital was making her extremely irritated and tired, and the large doses of pain killers left her dizzy and with her speech a little bit slurred. She could only go a couple of hours a day before feeling weak and eventually dozing off.

Today, however, there was something different. She felt like crap. Of course, there was the main obvious reason: she had been severely burnt when a man attacked her with acid in the middle of the street. But also, there was something more making her feel weird today. She was so tired that, even after a good night sleep – which was uncommon for the past few days – she could barely lift up her arm.

Looking around her, she realized that there was no one in the room. She looked at the clock beside her bed and saw that it was extremely early – 4:45 AM. Blaming the early hour for her lethargic state, she closed her eyes again and quickly drifted to an agitated sleep.

The next time she woke up, Emily was beside her. She gave herself a few moments to clear her head, and realized that she was feeling better now; it was definitely the early hour that left her in that exhausted post-sleep state.

"Hey there, sleeping beauty"

JJ looked puzzled for a moment when she looked at the brunette. What had she called her?

"Hey, Em"

Unbeknownst to JJ, Emily was berating herself for the way she let the words in her mind slip through her tongue so easily.

"How did you sleep?" She asked instead, shaking her head a little as to dismiss her thoughts.

"Hum, incredibly good, actually, considering, you know." JJ answered and looked at her hands, which were stinging a little bit.

"Good, that's good" Emily answered, looking at her. The agent couldn't count how many times she got lost looking at those gorgeous eyes.

After a few moments of silence, Emily continued.

"I just, uhm, came here to say that we, my team, I mean" Emily stopped for a moment and took a deep breath. "We have a case. I tried to sit back this one, but all I got was some time to come here and go back…"

"Oh" JJ said, saddened by her departure. "Of course, you didn't even have to come all the way here to tell me this. It's your job…" she finished, trying to believe in her own words.

"But the case is just a couple of cities away, so I won't be too far. Here, take my number, you can call me at any time, and I will answer." Emily said, writing down her personal number. "Unless, of course, I'm in the field, but I will call you back as soon as I can. I have already left my number with the nurses also, if don't mind."

JJ smiled a little at this and nodded. "I don't mind"

"And, hum, about what we talked yesterday…" Emily started, unsure. She had told the younger woman that they would talk today but she really had to go. Hotch was already a little annoyed when she asked to stay out of this case and when he denied, he was even more upset when she told him she was going with her own car to the city because she would go to the hospital first. He would be furious if she arrived at the police station late.

"No, don't worry about it. Go and kick some criminal ass, we can talk when you get back." JJ answered, smiling.

"You take care of yourself here, huh? I can't wait to show you my incredible Star Wars collection" Emily said, smirking.

"And you take care of yourself in the field. I'm the injured one here, don't want you to get jealous of me and steal all the attention" JJ replied, trying to lighten the mood joking over her own unfortunate situation.

"Oh, I wouldn't" Emily answered.

Then, she did something unexpected. She walked towards the blonde and gave her a light kiss on her forehead and then walked away. _Just relax, Prentiss. It was just a gesture of affection from a concerned person._

If she had looked at JJ, though, she would see the younger woman close her eyes and she would see the smile that adorned her lips.

* * *

Beth Warren walked around the corridors of the hospital while mentally cursing all the way. She loved her job, she really did, but sometimes it was all too much. On top of the frequent and annoying small confrontations between doctors and nurses, sometimes when things got out of hand, the ones in white left them all on their own to control the situation - which sucked, because with the nurse's strike that was going on, there weren't enough nurses to check on their current patients, let alone treat the new ones and try to control the mess that was the clinic. So, Beth was a very angry person right now.

"Luke, where is the medicine for the old lady in room 4? She did a hip replacement and is in pain, go there and see what you can do!" She said as she spotted one of the newest nurses in the hospital.

"Already on my way, Beth" the man quickly replied and started to walk away.

Beth then entered the nurse station and grabbed a few medical files that she needed and decided to pour herself some coffee.

"What are these files for, Beth?"

Beth, then, looked up to see Mary, her best friend, standing at the door. She immediately smiled, relishing the comfort to talk to someone she cared deeply about.

"I agreed to cover for Reynolds tonight in the Burn Unit. Just taking some files that I need."

Mary made a face and shuddered a little.

"I hate going there. There is so much hurt and sadness…" she said.

Beth chuckled at this.

"This is a hospital, Mary. There is hurt and sadness everywhere."

Mary shook her head.

"I know, it's not that. It's just that in there, even when you do your job and save a patient's life and help them getting out of here, it doesn't feel like you won… because they will be in pain and scarred probably for the rest of their lives."

Beth sighed and nodded. Her friend was absolutely right. She just agreed to do this because she owed Reynolds one. But almost everyone avoided the burn unit, especially if there was someone going through some procedure. No one liked to hear the screams that often came from there.

"Are you going to check on the woman that was attacked with acid?"

Beth was pulled out of her thoughts by the voice of her curious friend.

"You heard about that, huh?" She asked, taking a sip of her now ready coffee.

"The whole hospital has. Come on, how often do we see something like that here, and not only through the news?"

"Yeah, not often" Beth answered absent minded, not liking to talk about this case like this. She couldn't even imagine the pain this woman was going through.

"What is it? Something's bothering you" her so often perceptive friend pointed out.

"It's just…" Beth started, unsure of how to continue. "I feel for her. People usually get burned in car accidents, or fires, or something random, some misfortune that, while sad, is usually understandable. Accidents happen. People die in car crashes, people get hurt while walking the stairs to their own houses, people get accidentally burned. But with her… someone did that. On purpose. I think I would be freaking out if it was me…"

Mary just shrugged. It wasn't that she was insensitive, she just compartmentalized better. "Maybe she is"

"What?" Beth asked.

"Freaking out, I mean."

"Yeah, maybe she is…" she answered, thinking that this woman would probably have to see some psychiatrist after that.

"Well, good luck, then" Mary said and walked away.

Beth sighed once more and finished her coffee. Then, she grabbed the files and headed over to the burn unit. Sitting at the nurse station there, she started to go through the files to see which patient should be priority during the rounds. There was a guy that was just brought in after a car accident in which his car collided with a truck full of inflammable liquid. She would have to go check his wounds and see if it needed a change in dressing. Then, there was a kid who had an accident with hot kitchen oil. Besides the painful wounds, she had a fever. Infection. Kids were a priority and a kid with oil burns and an infection, she didn't even have to continue. She would be number one and the guy from the car crash would be number two.

Then, she had two more patients who have just undergone surgery for skin grafting. They would be her next two stops.

And then there was the patient she and her friend were talking about. Jennifer Jareau. This was her eighth day in the hospital. _Well, ninth, to be exact_ she corrected herself looking at her watch. Her wounds were healing as it was expected, no signs of infection. She would be her last visit.

Her visits went okay. The kid and the guy from the car crash were sleeping, probably due to the medicine they had taken, and the two patients from skin grafts were doing okay. In pain, but okay. It took her 40 minutes to check on all four of them. She liked to check everything with care and talk to them for a moment, or to the person that was in the room with them.

There was only one left to go. She entered in Jennifer's room and noticed that there wasn't anyone with her. But as soon as she got closer to her, she realized she should have come sooner. Because Jennifer was shivering in her bed and she had a fever of 104°F. She definitely had an infection.

* * *

Emily was driving at full speed in the middle of the night. She had received a call saying that there was a change in Jennifer's condition, but they would only be able to give her more information in person. So, she grabbed her things and left the hotel they were all staying, which led her to this moment, driving under a heavy rain and with no sleep at all.

The agent had sent Hotch a message to let him know where she was going, and she was sure that he wouldn't mind. The unsub they were chasing wasn't that smart and they were just a few hours from finding him; they would do just fine without her. Now she could focus on getting there and see what had happened to Jennifer.

She couldn't understand why she was so nervous about this. Of course she cared about her due to everything that happened, and all these days they had become closer, but still, there was something about her that Emily couldn't quite comprehend. And that made her want to stay around her even more.

Arriving at the hospital, she parked her car and headed to her room in record time. When she got there, she stopped dead in her tracks. Dr. Avery was in there, but there was also another one that she didn't know; there were also two nurses checking the machines and taking all kinds of measurement. But what scared her most was the way Jennifer looked. She had a ghostly appearance and she was covered in sweat. Her eyes were closed and she had a nasal cannula – which wasn't there before. Something was very wrong.

"Dr. Avery?" she called, letting him know through her voice how confused she was.

As soon as he spotted her, he got out of the room and walked to her.

"Prentiss, is good to see you here. I already talked to Dr. Reid, since he was her emergency contact, but I thought I should call you and let you know."

"Yes, I appreciate that. But what exactly should I know?" she asked, nervous.

"Prentiss, unfortunately Jennifer has an infection. We are doing some tests right now to decide what the best treatment option is, but at the time we are working to treat her symptoms, as they appear" he told her.

"And what are those symptoms?" she asked and looked at the blonde sleeping inside the room.

"She has a high fever, chills and shortness of breath. We are treating each symptom separately, but as soon as we know the kind of bacterial infection that she has, we will treat it more precisely."

Emily ran her fingers through her hair and sighed.

"But you were aware that this could happen, weren't you supposed to prevent that?" Emily inquired, frustrated.

"Yes, with burn wounds it is always a possibility and a risk factor. Bur her wounds were extensive and this is a hospital, we can't always prevent infections from happening. I'm sorry" he said apologetic.

"Well, your apologies don't count that much now, right?" she retorted.

Emily looked again at JJ. She couldn't let her die; she couldn't let her suffer even more. She didn't know why she felt so drawn into her, she just knew her for a few days! But her instincts told her that she couldn't back away now, she couldn't leave her alone. She knew they hadn't talked about this yet, but she would handle the consequences later. So, she just looked at him and said:

"You do whatever it takes to get her better, okay? Whatever procedure, whatever drug you need. Hell, hire the best doctor in this country if you have to! I'll pay for everything, just… just get her better" she finished and suddenly she felt very tired.

She walked into the room and sat on the chair by her side. She wouldn't back away now.


	9. Chapter 9

**AN: And I'm back! I'm really sorry that it took me almost three months to update this, but I am facing some personal problems that got in the way. A few of you may have read a songfic that I wrote, The Sound of Silence, but I had to take it down because songfics aren't allowed here *mybad* so you may know that I was in a dark place for a while. I'm still not out of the woods yet, but I'm getting there.**

 **I was really anxious about this chapter and I know that it may seem kind of pointless, but I thought that it was necessary a bonding between Emily and Reid, as well as some info on JJ and Reid's story. So this is more like a filler chapter. I hope you enjoy it and yes, I am back for good now!**

 **As always, I own nothing but my imagination. R &R**

 **Oops, I almost forgot it! SSC stands for 'Surviving Sepsis Campaign' ;)**

 **Eighth**

Emily walked back into the room and, exhausted after a tough case in Alabama, didn't even notice the man leaning against the window in the dark. She pulled a chair and sighed, sitting beside the bed. It had been 6 days since the doctors discovered that Jennifer had an infection. And she hadn't improved.

In fact, the doctors were so worried that Emily stopped paying attention to what they said during examinations, focusing only on official reports. _We're not there yet,_ she kept reminding herself. During all this time, JJ was in a semi-conscious state, in and out periods of delirium.

JJ was asleep now – _or was she unconscious?_ – and she was paler than ever. Emily ran her hand through her face and sighed again. What had she gotten herself into? Sometimes she wanted to just go away from all of this, but when she remembered Jennifer's deep blue eyes agonizing with pain, when she remembered that the blonde only had one friend that came in for her, all her will to leave just vanished. She was an FBI agent; it was her duty to help people, and if there was one time when she was happy to be a Prentiss, it was now. She had money and contacts and she was going to use it, if needed.

Emily gently held JJ's hand between hers and stood in silence for a moment, until she found her voice to speak.

"Hey there" she started, and paused, organizing her thoughts. "Sorry I haven't been here the past couple of days. We had a case in Alabama, it was tough… I got a little bit hurt too." She put her other hand on her forehead and laughed. "Garcia says I am a head injury collector. According to her, it's the universe's way of trying to fight my hard-headedness" She stood in silence for a moment, thinking about Garcia. "You would like her. And she would like you. I hope one day you can meet her…" Emily finished.

"It would be good for her to meet someone"

Emily heard a voice say and almost jumped off of her chair.

"What…?" She asked, looking behind her.

"Sorry. You didn't see me when you entered and I didn't want to interrupt your moment with her" the voice said, embarrassed.

"You're Spencer Reid." Emily said, taking a deep breath. "You scared me to death"

Reid thought about replying that he didn't really do that, because she was, well, alive, but thought against it. If JJ were awake, she would smack him in the head for saying that. Instead, he went towards the bed and sat next to his friend.

"The doctors diagnosed her with severe sepsis this afternoon." He told her.

Emily gulped and asked slowly. "What does that mean?"

"It means that her infection has progressed and, if it gets worse, we might worry for septic shock, which can be fatal…"

Emily nodded and got silent. She couldn't explain it, but she felt a knot in her throat just to think about it.

"But they are already following the SSC Guidelines*" Reid continued. "And it seems to be working… at least she hasn't gotten worse…"

Emily nodded again, still unable to speak.

"I met her in college, you know?" Emily looked up to see Reid staring at Jennifer, his mind miles away from that sterile room. "Well, I was in my third graduation and she was the gorgeous girl in the class that every guy drooled over. But she was more than just a pretty face; in fact, when you get to know her, 'pretty' is the last thing that comes to your mind when you think about her… intelligent, caring, smart, selfless…"

Emily nodded, but realized the he didn't see her. In fact, she doubted that he even remembered that she was in the room with him.

"And then, during one work that we did together, we started talking. She was always so good to me… and then she owned that presentation! Even with my IQ I couldn't have gotten the highest score without her; I was always terrible with people, but she had something – she _has_ something – that makes everybody comfortable around her. She was the most incredible person I had ever seen… and as everybody else, I was in love with her."

Emily licked her dry lips, already anticipating the next events. They obviously weren't together, so something happened to cease his crush on her. Or was it still there?

"But then, we started to get closer and closer. Of course I wasn't her best friend, because she was super close with other two students, but we were good friends. I knew I never had a chance with her, but she made me feel so good that I was happy to just being around her. Of course, there were stupid people, mostly men that thought just because she was nice to them, she owed them sex. But she dealt with them, and I had the best friend I could hope for."

And just when Emily was waiting to hear a 'but'…

"But then, one day everything changed. I'm not sure what happened, but she wasn't happy anymore. She lost her spark, even though she hid it well. But I could see that she was unhappy and I couldn't stand it anymore. So I came up with the idea for this company, and she agreed immediately. As soon as we graduated, we moved here to DC leaving everything behind. She never had any contact again with her friends, so I think it had something to do with them…"

Emily looked at JJ's form and wondered what had happened to make her leave everything behind and start over. She didn't deserve this; no one did.

"She was happy, you know?"

Emily looked at him and saw the shadow of a smile on his lips. "Really?"

"Yes. Of course, she wasn't her old self, but she was getting there. She loved her job." Then, he got serious, almost angry. " _Loves._ She loves her job."

He lowered his head and shook it.

"I keep saying things in the past, as if she…almost like if I don't believe that…"

Emily, seeing his agony, tried to calm him down. "Hey, I get it. I know that you didn't lose hope. You're just comparing the state she is now to the way she is in her life, which isn't like this. I get it."

He looked at her and seemed relieved for a moment.

"Thanks"

"Anytime"

They both stood there, looking at the figure on the bed, until he spoke again.

"You guys aren't investigating her case anymore, are you?"

A painful and yet angry look passed through Emily's face.

"No." Then, she sighed. "I tried to, but Hotch, my boss, says that this isn't FBI business and that our presence wasn't requested by local authorities. Since I was a witness, all we could do was sending a preliminary profile, out of 'good will and cooperation between law agencies'. Now it's up to them."

"Oh" that was all that Reid said.

Emily looked at him and, seeing the worry on his face, felt bad for disappointing him. And JJ.

"I'm sorry" she whispered.

"You don't have to" Reid answered, absent minded. Then, he looked at her. "You've been a great help; I really appreciate that. JJ shouldn't be here, she shouldn't…" he looked down and ran his hands through his face. "I can't lose her… so thank you for doing all of this" he finished and looked at her, his eyes shining with unshed tears.

"You really like her, don't you?" Emily asked, trying to hold back her own emotions.

"She's the sister that I never had…" he said, but they stopped talking abruptly when they heard the heart monitor get quicker. Emily rushed to JJ's bed and Reid stood up and kept watching her vitals.

"Jayje, it's me, Emily. Can you hear me?" she asked, when she saw JJ's eyelids flutter. "Come on Jay, it's been a while. We have to catch up a little bit…"

JJ opened her eyes and Emily watched intently as they slowly started to focus. While she was becoming aware of her surroundings, Emily filled a glass with water and gave it to the blonde. JJ took a small sip of it and then sighed.

"How are you feeling" Emily asked.

"Like my skin is melting. Which is pretty much what's happening, so I guess I am okay…" she shrugged and Emily laughed. It was so good to hear her voice again.

"The treatment is working" Reid said. "Your temperature dropped for the last hour, but you're still hot."

"I've always been hot" JJ replied smugly and grinned.

Emily scoffed at it and laughed harder when she saw how red Reid was becoming.

"Yeah, uhm… I will… I will go get the doctor to… uhm, check on you" he said and left the room quickly.

Emily was still laughing and looked at the blonde.

"You really got him there"

"That's my favorite hobby" JJ replied weakly.

Emily was suddenly concerned again and got closer to her, holding her uninjured hand. "Rest a little more. You're getting better, but you need to rest"

"Yess, I think I will do that…" JJ slurred a bit. "I was dreamin' 'bout you. Maybe I will continue from where I stopped… things were getting interestin'…" she slurred again and then immediately closed her eyes.

Emily just looked at her shocked and wondered what drugs the doctor had given to her.


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: Hey there! Sorry for the long wait... I hope you're still with me on this.**

 **I own nothing but my computer. And I'm not even sure if it is really mine...**

 **R &R**

 **Ninth**

And suddenly, things started to get better. The treatment was working, JJ was healing well and Emily was facing a series of bureaucratic, boring days at work. Everything was perfect.

Emily still didn't know what JJ was dreaming about her the day she woke up, and she doubted that the blonde remembered it either. The FBI agent was getting closer and closer to both JJ and her friend Spencer and the doctors were expecting to release JJ the following day.

At the moment, JJ was talking about one trial that Reid had mastered, a couple of months before. Emily was just glad to hear JJ talking. Seeing her so full of energy was something that Emily couldn't explain why, but it made her smile from ear to ear.

"… and then Reid started asking questions so quickly and one after another that when he asked 'why did you kill her?' to the defendant, he just blurted out: 'because she deserved it!.' After that, I think the jury made their decision in record time." JJ finished and laughed.

Reid smiled and added "He couldn't deal with pressure very well…"

Then, there was a knock on the door and shortly after that, Dr. Avery entered the room.

"Hey there, sorry to interrupt." He said, and then smiled walking towards JJ. "Are you ready to get the hell out of here?"

"Please! I'll go insane if I stay here any longer!" JJ answered laughing, but you could see some truth behind her words.

"But will you be able to release her today? I thought it would be tomorrow…" Emily asked, afraid that he was rushing things a little bit. After the infection, Emily had been really worried that something else might happen to the blonde.

"Tomorrow is what we have planned, but I don't see why we couldn't release her today. I will just run some tests, but I don't think we will have some problems."

Emily nodded unsure but smiled anyway.

"So, can I take a look at your bandages?" Dr. Avery asked looking at JJ.

Reid immediately got up. "Uhm, I will go… to the cafeteria. I'll be back in a few"

"Sure" JJ answered, but Emily saw a flicker of sadness cross her eyes. What had caused that?

"Can I stay?" Emily asked, looking intently at JJ. The blonde looked down for a second but then lifted up her head, and all signs of insecurity perfectly controlled.

"Sure, if you don't find disgusting seeing some delicious burned flesh" JJ said with a retorted smile.

 _So that was the problem,_ Emily realized. JJ inferred that Reid thought she was disgusting when he quickly left the room.

"Of course not. There's nothing disgusting about you." She reassured the blonde.

JJ opened her mouth as if to say something, but then closed it again and just nodded.

Emily moved closer to her and held her hand, while Dr. Avery lifted up her hospital gown and checked the dressings. Emily could see, then, for the first time in a while, the extension of JJ's injuries, and she was mortified to see how much she must have been hurting. Her whole back was covered in bandages, until the beginning of her neck. Some parts of it were still red, but some parts were starting to get whitish, which Emily thought it was a good sign.

"Well, the healing process is going according to what we expected and I am very positive that I will be able to release you today. I will just work on some papers and I will be back as soon as possible"

And then it was just the two women in the room. Emily was still holding JJ's hand, running her thumb over the soft fingers of the blonde's uninjured hand.

"Emily…" JJ whispered, and if there were any other noise in the room, Emily wouldn't have heard her.

"Yes?"

Silence.

Emily looked up and saw JJ biting her lips, a clear sign that she was nervous. "Jen?" she tried.

"I'm sorry" the blonde whispered again.

That confused Emily.

"About… what?" the FBI agent asked and shook her head.

The blonde sighed and looked at her, fear written all over her face.

"You've been so kind to me and I shouldn't… I shouldn't have kissed you like that, it was… inappropriate…"

Now Emily was just flabbergasted.

What was she talking about?

Did she…

"Please, say something…" the blonde pleaded, and Emily hated to see her like that, so uncomfortable and embarrassed and afraid. So, she just said "It's okay. Don't worry about it, really, it's fine"

She saw relief cross the younger woman's face as she gave her a smile to reassure her, but her mind was in frenzy.

Did JJ dream about kissing her?

* * *

Emily looked worried at JJ. After Dr. Avery came in and talked to her about future aesthetic procedures, she locked herself in her own minds and was awkwardly quiet. The FBI agent – the mighty profiler – didn't know how to approach this. Should she talk to JJ or give her space? Should she touch the financial aspect – that Emily knew was worrying her – or should she stay in silence?

"I could use the silence for a moment"

Emily's head snapped up and she saw the blonde staring out the window.

"What? But I am not…"

"I could hear your mind working from miles and miles away" JJ said and slowly turned to look at her, a small smile on her lips.

"Sorry"

"Don't be, it's fine. Do you want to ask me something?"

Straight to the point.

"I, uhm… no, just… know that I'm here for you, ok?" Emily said, taking JJ's hand between hers and caressing it softly.

JJ nodded slowly. "Okay"

Emily looked at JJ's troubled eyes and at that moment, she wanted nothing more than just hold her tight. She was about to do just that when the door opened.

"Well, I'm afraid I interrupted something"

JJ looked at the door and was confused, not recognizing the woman standing there. She looked back at Emily and could see that behind that mask of control, she was just as puzzled as herself. But then, Emily cleared her throat and stood.

"What are you doing here, Mother?"


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: Sorry about the way too long wait guys, and I am very happy that I still have followers. Here's some short and light chapter. Please, bear with me. I am just getting back to writing and I am far from my best.**

 **PS: You may want to read the previous chapter to remember where I left off. That's what I had to do XD**

 **R &R**

 **Tenth**

"What do you want?" Emily went straight to the point, as soon as she got her mother out of the room to not disturb JJ.

"Can't a mother visit her only daughter?"

"Not you." Emily answered coolly.

Elizabeth Prentiss cleared her throat and looked around.

"It wasn't hard to find out where you were. And what you are doing… with our money." Elizabeth said slowly.

"Have you been spying on me? That's my money!" Emily answered in a low but harsh voice.

"Our money. And I'm not spying, I'm just… taking care of you."

"That is my money, the only good thing you ever gave to me and I don't want you snooping around on what I am doing with it." Emily said and took a deep breath trying to control herself.

She looked to JJ's room and saw that a nurse was there. When she looked back at her mother, the ambassador continued.

"You are right. I won't pry anymore. But I do have to say that what you are doing here is…" Elizabeth paused, searching for the right word and Emily closed her fists anticipating what she would say. "…admirable."

"What?" For that Emily wasn't prepared.

"You saw an injustice happening, tried to catch the guy who caused this and when you couldn't, you tried to comfort and help the victim. That is very admirable of you, Emily." Elizabeth said and curved her lips a little, in what was supposed to be a smile.

"Okay…"

Elizabeth took Emily's arm and started walking, forcing Emily to go with her.

"You may not see it like that, but what you are doing here is very similar to what I do around the world. You are trying to help someone and I try to do the same."

"By negotiating with other governments and representing the interests of the United States?" Emily scoffed.

"The United States Government is interested in helping people." Elizabeth answered sharply, and Emily waited for her to continue. "What I am trying to say is that I want to help you as well, Emily. I want to help her. I know that she doesn't have money…"

"You looked into her?" Emily asked dumbfounded.

Elizabeth barely acknowledged her and continued. "She is severely hurt. She's not only going to need nurses, medical equipment, surgeries, appointments with doctors but also lawyers, afford the law suit, someone to protect her in case the man who did this decides to try again…" she trailed off and Emily froze.

She didn't think about that possibility.

Her mother looked at her knowingly. "I'm not dumb to offer her money, Emily. But I'm offering you and her all my support. If there's anything that I can do for you, you just say. I have contacts, ways to find people, to get to judges… anything."

Emily shook her head, still confused about where this conversation went.

"Thank you, mother, but I think we can manage."

Elizabeth sighed and stared ahead.

"Well, the offer stands for as long as you may need."

With that she turned and walked away.

* * *

JJ was arguing with a nurse when Emily got back to the room.

"…I won't!" Emily heard JJ say and the blonde looked at her when she walked in. "Great, Emily, tell her that I've been trapped in this bed for enough time and that I am going to walk out of here now. Literally."

Emily looked at the poor nurse. She was young and visibly new at this, and the brunette didn't want to be in her shoes.

"Madam, I'm sorry but this is hospital's policy. We have to get you out on a wheelchair."

JJ suddenly looked outraged.

"Madam? Did you… did she just call me madam?" The blonde looked at Emily, ignoring the nurse.

Emily laughed at that and, seeing that JJ was indeed serious, she cleared her throat and addressed the nurse.

"I'll talk to her, sorry." The nurse nodded and got out of the room.

"Jen…" Emily started.

"Emily." JJ retorted.

Emily knew JJ wouldn't budge. She was finally going out of the hospital after what felt like an eternity, and she would do it on her own, because that was who she is: independent. The agent sighed, defeated.

"Let's get out of here. I'll deal with the policies." _I learned how to do this even before I was born anyway_.

JJ had already signed the forms and Spencer was waiting for her.

"Shouldn't you be on a wheelchair? You shouldn't be walking!" Reid said as soon as he saw the blonde.

"And you shouldn't be talking." JJ retorted.

Spencer looked at Emily and she mouthed _"Don't ask"._

Emily led them to her car; she would take them to JJ's apartment. The blonde sat on the passenger seat while Spencer sat on the back.

"Spence…" JJ said. "I'm sorry about that. I just want to get out of here." She finished and looked at Emily.

Emily grinned.

"As you wish, madam."

Spencer did not understand when JJ slapped Emily hard on the back of her head.


End file.
